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Meddling KidsMarca: Magic: The GatheringMeddling Kids {2}{W}{U} Creature — Human Child As Meddling Kids enters the battlefield, choose a word with four or more letters. Spells with the chosen word in their text box can’t be cast. These kids know their four-letter words. 2/3 Illustrated by Christopher Moeller
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Ass Whuppin'Marca: Magic: The GatheringAss Whuppin' {1}{W}{B} Sorcery Destroy target silver-bordered permanent in any game you can see from your seat. Asses to ashes, Donkeys to dust. Illustrated by Don Hazeltine
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"Ach! Hans, Run!"Marca: Magic: The Gathering"Ach! Hans, Run!" {2}{R}{R}{G}{G} Enchantment At the beginning of your upkeep, you may say “Ach Hans, run It’s the …” and the name of a creature card. If you do, search your library for a card with that name, put it onto the battlefield,...
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Uktabi KongMarca: Magic: The GatheringUktabi Kong {5}{G}{G}{G} Creature — Ape Trample When Uktabi Kong enters the battlefield, destroy all artifacts. Tap two untapped Apes you control: Create a 1/1 green Ape creature token. “I desire the acquisition of a potassium-rich fruit comestible of substantial magnitude.” 8/8 Illustrated by...
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Symbol StatusMarca: Magic: The GatheringSymbol Status {2}{G}{G} Sorcery Create a 1/1 colorless Expansion-Symbol creature token for each different expansion symbol among permanents you control. “Everyone break into teams. Weaponry, you’re with me. Nature group, meet by the palm tree. Stoneworks and metalworks, follow the anvil. Everyone else, gather...
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SupersizeMarca: Magic: The GatheringSupersize {1}{G} Instant Target creature gets +3½/+3½ until end of turn. You want “mise” with that? Illustrated by DiTerlizzi
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Stone-Cold BasiliskMarca: Magic: The GatheringStone-Cold Basilisk {4}{G} Creature — Basilisk Whenever Stone-Cold Basilisk blocks or becomes blocked by a creature with fewer letters in its name, destroy that creature at end of combat. (Punctuation and spaces aren’t letters.) Whenever an opponent reads Stone-Cold Basilisk, that player is turned...
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S.N.O.T.Marca: Magic: The GatheringS.N.O.T. {G} Creature — Ooze You may have S.N.O.T. enter the battlefield stuck to another creature named S.N.O.T. If you do, all those creatures form a single creature. S.N.O.T.‘s power and toughness are each equal to the square of the number of cards named...
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Side to SideMarca: Magic: The GatheringSide to Side {2}{G} Instant You and target opponent arm-wrestle. If you win, create a 3/3 green Ape creature token. His friends at the gym never knew Garanth’s secret shame. For years he had tried to walk away from professional arm wrestling, but hey—free...
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Shoe TreeMarca: Magic: The GatheringShoe Tree {4}{G} Creature — Treefolk Shoe Tree enters the battlefield with up to two shoe counters on it. Use your shoes as counters. Shoe Tree gets +1/+1 for each shoe counter on it. It grows several feet a year. 3/3 Illustrated by Francis...
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RemodelMarca: Magic: The GatheringRemodel {2}{G} Instant If you control two or more green permanents that share an artist, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost. Exile target artifact. 6 PM (23) This Old Grove 98055 A rusted masticore makes a beautiful addition to any...
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Our Market Research Shows That Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made this Card to Have the Absolute Longest Card Name Ever ElementalMarca: Magic: The GatheringOur Market Research Shows That Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made this Card to Have the Absolute Longest Card Name Ever Elemental {1}{G}{G} Creature — Elemental Art rampage 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked by a creature, it gets +2/+2 for...
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Old FogeyMarca: Magic: The GatheringOld Fogey {G}{G} Summon — Dinosaur Phasing, cumulative upkeep {1}, echo {G}{G}, fading 3, bands with other Dinosaurs, protection from Homarids, snow-covered plainswalk, flanking, rampage 2 “These kids today with their collector numbers and their newfangled tap symbol. Twenty Black Lotuses and twenty Plague...
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Name DroppingMarca: Magic: The GatheringName Dropping {1}{G} Enchantment Gotcha — If an opponent says a word that’s in the name of a card in your graveyard, you may say “Gotcha” When you do, return that card to your hand. Gemini (May 21–June 21) This week is a good...
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Monkey Monkey MonkeyMarca: Magic: The GatheringMonkey Monkey Monkey {3}{G} Creature — Monkey As Monkey Monkey Monkey enters the battlefield, choose a letter. Monkey Monkey Monkey gets +1/+1 for each nonland permanent whose name begins with the chosen letter. Many matches make more madcap monkey mayhem. 1/1 Illustrated by Liz...
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Laughing HyenaMarca: Magic: The GatheringLaughing Hyena {1}{G} Creature — Hyena Gotcha — If an opponent laughs, you may say “Gotcha” When you do, return Laughing Hyena from your graveyard to your hand. “Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, ‘It’s getting...
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Land Aid '04Marca: Magic: The GatheringLand Aid '04 {G}{G} Sorcery Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle your library. If you sang a song the whole time you were searching and shuffling, you may untap that land. Illustrated by...
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Keeper of the Sacred WordMarca: Magic: The GatheringKeeper of the Sacred Word {2}{G} Creature — Human Druid As Keeper of the Sacred Word enters the battlefield, choose a word. Whenever an opponent says the chosen word, Keeper of the Sacred Word gets +3/+3 until end of turn. This is not a...
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Graphic ViolenceMarca: Magic: The GatheringGraphic Violence {2}{G} Instant All creatures with art by the artist of your choice get +2/+2 and gain trample until end of turn. WARNING: THE DOMINARIAN SURGEON GENERAL HAS FOUND THAT SAVAGE BEATINGS CAN LEAD TO CHUMP BLOCKS, LIFE REDUCTION, AND EVEN GAME LOSS....
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Granny's PaybackMarca: Magic: The GatheringGranny's Payback {7}{G} Sorcery You gain life equal to your age. R&D Comments BB 10/10: Why does a life-gaining card show an old lady killing people? MR (10/10/03): We’ll fix it in the flavor text. Illustrated by Joel Thomas
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